A meaningful Advice

 

“Look, how well she studies and look at yourself!”, “Mr. X’s son got a job in the US and look where you stand!”, “Y’s got a handsome package and you, you hardly earn anything”, “He studies for ten hours a day and you, can barely sit for ten minutes in a place” These are some things we’ve always heard at some point in our life! Maybe were taunted in the above ways by outsiders or maybe our parents said it to us! I was a varied category, as I compared myself many time with others!

When I was twelve years old, I had one of the best conversations with my paternal uncle. As a kid, I was bragging about how well I scored in a test that was conducted in my school, “I have scored fourteen out of fifteen and none of my classmates were able to do so!” to which my uncle replied, “I am happy that you scored well. But, don’t compare yourself with your classmates, you will limit your score to the highest marks and not fight for full marks!” was his polite reply. This came as a life lesson for me!

Often, I see people comparing with their colleagues on the grounds of salary, the appraisals they get, the houses they live in, the cars they drive and many more things. Comparing with people generates jealousy….a negative trait! Holding a grudge against someone diverts our attention to pulling the other person down rather than pushing oneself up. The point is when we compare ourselves with others, we restrict our growth and potential only to overpower others. This attitude may get one into being ‘one of the bests’ but not ‘the best’. In the ‘Mahabharata’ it was ‘Karna’ who always restricted himself to overpower ‘Arjuna’……his quest to defeat ‘Arjuna’ got him to do many evil acts which ultimately lead to his fall and ‘Arjuna’s’ fame!

As a person we must always try to better ourselves but, envying someone may not help. I have an alternative to this which was also suggested by my uncle…..compare with your previous self. What I mean to say is, do better than what you have already done and this strategy would do you much better!

I have experienced it myself and now I always opt for this technique of self assessment. I compare what I scored in previous test to what I score now….if I have improved I celebrate and if I haven’t I try harder. That’s my way to keep a check on myself and to improve a bit every day! If you compete with your own self you know that you are a better version of yourself and trust me this doesn’t generate any envy and keeps you on track!

Comparison with the best is no measure to success as success is unlimited!